Hakomi: essential tool for TCM?

About the Method: Hakomi is based on the idea that much of our everyday suffering is unnecessary and is produced by unconscious beliefs that are irrelevant, untrue, or out of date. The method is designed to bring these limiting or wrong ideas into consciousness. Hakomi is a method of assisted self-study and discovery. Once these beliefs (memories, habits, emotions) are conscious, they can be examined and changed to offer a more satisfying way of being. The Hakomi therapist pays very close attention to the way the client expresses him or herself nonverbally. Such things as tone of voice, movements, gestures, posture, facial expressions are usually very significant indicators of beliefs and unconscious material. On the basis of those observations, the therapist creates little experiments, (often just saying a statement), experiments that are done with the client in a mindful state. Such experiments may evoke reactions, often emotional ones. When reactions are evoked, memories, beliefs and associations may emerge which help clients realize something about themselves. As Moshe Feldenkrais used to say, we cannot do what we want until we know what we are actually doing.

What to Expect: This method is not about talking about problems or listening to a story. Your history is written in the way you do things now, your style, your defining characteristics. So, you can expect that the therapist will be looking and listening for these and will bring them to your attention as part of setting up the little experiments in mindfulness that are the core of the work. the therapist will also be genuinely kind and patient, safe, caring, and non-judgmental. the vulnerability and openness of mindfulness require an extremely safe environment. You can expect the work to bring up emotions. The therapist knows how to be with you when this happens and knows how to offer comfort and help you understand.

What You Need: You need to be willing to be with your own present experience. Your reactions to experiments in mindfulness will be the basis of the work you do. So, you need to be willing to stay focused on your experience. You need to be open to going into mindfulness, which is a calm, inwardly focused state, to simply witness yourself and what happens inside you. You might experience some painful emotions on the way to finding out how to relieve your unnecessary suffering and let go of limiting beliefs and old habitual patterns. You need to be willing to speak about yourself as you feel now. This work is not about asking questions, problem solving or making conversation. The courage you have to be open and honest in looking at yourself are your greatest allies. The rewards will be a deeper understanding of yourself and others, greater pleasure in everyday living, and richer, happier relationships. Self-study can create all that.